Oh, Morlock. I love it when you give me that easy in.
There are a number of cliched responses I could offer to what you've written below (and I probably will, over beers while you help me paint my house), but you've made some things float to my mind. First of all, this place is larger than you think, with a healthy, and largely well-educated, transient population. That means that there is a good chance that anyone you have the opportunity to tango with may well be gone in 6 to 12 months (if not by this weekend). This is also a place that supports strong, ambitious women - so worries about ruining your position as a nice guy are largely unfounded. Your worries should be about being eaten alive for breakfast by the ball-breakers you are certain to encounter in this neck of the woods.
And, as an aside - I am going to let you in on what could either be Spanish Fly or penis repellent to women our age: honesty. I know this smacks of the cliched response I made note to avoid, but it's true. You have no job and no permanent place to live (for now), but that's not exactly the same as having no ambition (or lacking the skills to fulfill an ambition) and no motivation for moving forward. The honesty thing is tricky though; if someone asked you what you've been doing with yourself in the space between jobs, would your honest answer be, well, interesting? Would it reveal something about your character or your personality? Is what you have been doing what you want to be doing to pass the time? If it is, good. If it isn't, then do what you want to be able to tell people that you do. Make yourself fuckable.
Trust me when I say that for women (well, at least some of them) it isn't all about jobs, or a thick head of hair, or the lack of a paunch when considering guys. Mostly it's about someone who has a life that they enjoy and who doesn't seem weighed down with baggage and dark, depressing shit (we've grown out of that phase of our lives where the dark, depressing shit is actually attractive). When it comes down to it, it's mostly about cracking up and feeling good and (god help me) being taken seriously every once in awhile.
And aren't most things cyclical? Why rationalize away a decreased libido? Wouldn't it make sense that not exercising and not feeling confident about what's happening at this exact moment would affect your interest in... performing? And, I hate to break it to you, but we aren't quite middle-aged, so it's too soon to start gathering those excuses. You're in a funk, and not in an inevitable and unavoidable lifestyle as a result of your chronological place on the life spectrum.
Okay, so maybe this did turn into a sort of cliched response, but fuck it. You know why we hate cliches? Because sometimes they are true and sometimes they apply to our lives and it's annoying.
So turn off the fucking television and get your ass down to the JC Penny. And fill out an application while you're there.
The Monkey
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1 comment:
Hey, I had to do SOMETHING to get you to post again.
And simply because the travails of the past six months HAVE actually been quite interesting does not somehow make me impervious to the their effects on my psyche and/or libido. I think recognizing the fallout of this whole ordeal is quite far-reaching isn't an indictment of self-pity - it's merely recognition.
Fuck JC Penney, I'm playing guitar.
"Put that fucking coffee down. Coffee is for closers!" - Movie Quote for tthe week.
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